LILLY JENSON
SATURDAY, 25TH OCTOBER 2008
23:40
Lilly on ...
Me and Josh went for a walk earlier when we got back from the hospital. He hadn't said a single word all day to anyone, but when we were alone again he finally started talking.
We went to the canal and sat down on a bench and it was absolutely freezing, and Josh put his arm around me; I think it was comfort for him as well as keeping me warm. He told me lots of stories about what he, Mikey and Jordon did when they were younger. Some of them included his Mum, some of them didn't. It was nice to sit down and hear him talk about it, and he even laughed a few times.
It was silent between us again for a while, and I didn't really know what to say to him about what's happened. He hasn't told me how he feels and he hasn't really spoken about it; he hasn't really shown his emotions yet either and I can see that he's trying his hardest to act strong.
I really enjoyed our walk but I wasn't sure whether Josh wanted to be alone for a bit with his family, although he didn't ask me to leave so I went back to his house and everyone was there; his Dad, Jordon, Mikey and their Grandparents. Mikey was really upset and confused about the situation and didn't understand where his Mum was, but he calmed down a bit when he saw Josh and he sat with him for a while whilst I helped their Nana make some food.
The house was so quiet all night and no-one really ate anything. I feel so awful for them all, it must be so horrible for them to have to go through all of this after already being put through it once before. I honestly had no idea.
Josh has just come into his room from his shower and he looks so deflated. Utterly gorgeous, but deflated. I don't know what to say to make him feel any better but hopefully me being here is enough.
Labels: LILLY JENSON
